It’s hard to be when the world sees you upside down.

I feel so damaged it’s hard to think straight

Yet I know I’m fine.

Wounds from my past still haunt me

Persecute me to no end.

All I want is to be happy yet every time I try,

Something pulls me back, something holds me down.


I will not try again after this time because

Fool me once, shame on you

Fool me twice, shame on me

There won’t be a third.




A clearer shade of self is what I seek

Transparency in all my ways.

I will be blunt and cut things down

And with the wrath of twelve years on

I will live on.


Trim my branches

Encrypt my tongue

That none may see

‘cept those who

true of heart like King Arthur

May take out what’s right for them.

Excalibur, Excalibur the sword.


False prophets often come, of which the many I am one.

Fear not for I am no one’s ‘cept the one that counts.

2000 fall, that 2 may rise above this fall.

And many Winters set in depths of blue will come to those who seek, for they will find my god, my god in whom I trust.