Am I real?
Do I even exist?
Life came together and I was created.
Something happened that brought me to be.
Is it fate? Cause I don’t feel free.
I feel trapped in something I wouldn’t call life.
Expectations of what I am supposed to be.
Desires formed by others foreign to myself
Ideals I wouldn’t choose if I was my own.
If I was my own civilization wouldn’t exist
Society, propriety, what does it all mean?
My soul has been taken
It’s a prisoner of war.
Kept behind bars
Deep down inside my body
How do I reclaim my beloved old spirit
How do I make it my own
Unafraid, bold, not obtrusive, gentle, and sweet.
Who am, I who are you?
Where do we stand in the passage of time?
Where are we headed?
What’s the end to this game we call living?
We hide behind masks we think set us free.
Use and abuse
Dear God I wish it wasn’t so.
We don’t understand
What is the meaning of life?
And if I wasn’t meant to ask then why is it I can think?
It is a torture
A never ending pain
In this world we all call home
I wish I was really home
Not here not there not anywhere
Just living and loving and being happy
Not thinking not feeling not anything
Just existing without
Without you without me without anything
Just being perhaps breathing and seeing what it means to be alive.
I don’t know anyone who has lived
Only boxes with something bouncing there inside
Wishing they were something, someone real.
I cant wrap my brain around it
The shadows on the wall
They keep dancing
Put me in a trance
I think I’ll call it destiny
Do I have the right to be
Or is it just a privilege that I’m here?
They say life is a gift
Count your blessings
Life is beautiful
You only live once
You are lucky to be alive
But if life is a privilege why does it feel I have been cursed
Marked with sin and desire
We are the product of our circumstances
Making the most of what we have. Doing the best we can. Looking for solutions.
Preaching, demanding what is ours. But what is ours? If even the smallest portions of ourselves are contrived.
What is truth and what is real?
Feed me that because I want to live a life that’s real.